I had an incident happen to me a couple of weekends ago. Someone disrespected me. It was a security guard to a neighboring gated community where we live. The dude decided that a cyclist had no business being in his particular neighborhood despite the fact that I was on the open road and was turning around in the sales center parking lot and in no way attempting to enter the community. He made the decision that I didn’t belong and refused to even allow me to enter the sales office. I guess millionaires don’t ride bicycles. Needless to say, I was furious at being treated in such a manner.
I quickly went home, cleaned up and returned as a prospective client driving a car and dressed in my favorite resort casual attire. I relayed my experience at the sales office and received not only a wonderful tour of an absolutely gorgeous community but also had the opportunity to face my antagonist face to face and receive a proper apology. I thoroughly enjoyed “educating” this man on the proper way to handle this type of situation going forward and left knowing that the next person coming in would not be treated so shabbily.
Of course a short while later… guilt set in. Why? Did the guy not deserve his dressing down? Not a chance. If anything I went easy on the crusty crankpot. What made me feel guilty was that in the grand scheme of things, what that guy did to me didn’t really matter. It didn’t really affect me in any way. I don’t live to have someone show me respect while I’m bike riding.
No what really got me was that I was how quick I was to act when someone wasn’t nice to ME. However, several weeks ago, I witnessed an event where someone on a church’s hospitality team, greeting team,…. whatever you want to call it…. was less than nice to a family. A large family, more than eight and culturally different than this host team member. I don’t know that race had anything to do with it but watching how she treated all of her “kind” (my family included), it did make me wonder.
I shook my head thinking “that will never happen at Accelerate Church.” But instead of critiquing what that person did, why didn’t I take the opportunity to stand in and make sure that the family was made to feel welcome? So what if it wasn’t my church? What was more important? This family was treated just as if not more shabbily than I was but they were in church and I was on a bike ride. What matters more? Do you think that they were in the right frame of mind to enjoy the service and absorb the message? Probably not.
We need to remember that doing what’s right is important and doing what’s right for others is greater still.
Matthew 22: 37And he said to him, “You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. 38This is the great and first commandment. 39And a second is like it: You shall love your neighbor as yourself.
Marti
June 9, 2010 at 11:36 am
Nate, I have to disagree with you, at least pertaining to the guard. What the guard did to you DID really matter. Not only to you, but also to others following you. Sometimes people need to be reminded that what we do to others DOES matter. As you said, when you came back, you were polite and didn’t “go off on him”. I think you did the right thing and shouldn’t feel guilty about it. After all, perhaps he is a greeter in his own church and just might make someone feel welcome too. This incident made YOU think of how others should be treated, and maybe now he will also. You were right though about the greeter in the church you attended. First impressions (greeters, etc) can make ALL the difference.